Adapted from The Book of No: 250 Ways to Say It—and Mean It and Stop People-Pleasing Forever by Susan Newman, Ph.D.
For some people the holidays are a time for friends, family, and relaxation, but for many, even most, the pressure to get everything done and be merry is just too much. . Bickering relatives, end-of-year office demands, feuding friends and over-stimulated children add their own strong tugs on your sanity, patience and already overflowing To-Do list. It’s enough to make anyone want to hibernate until spring. There is an easy way to sidestep holiday stress and feel rested and joyous as you begin the New Year. The solution lies in one simple word—“no.”
Once put into action, the power of “no” is limitless. It eliminates the need to push yourself to the max or to spend the holidays somewhere other than where you want to be. But even as you become more aware of your dwindling time and resources, refusing requests can seem an impossible task. Here are ten tips taken from The Book of No to ease the awkwardness and difficulty of refusing others; they will help you cope with the season’s demands (and way beyond). With these in mind, you’ll able to say “no” and mean it, and along the way you’ll find your “holiday blues” melting away.
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Susan Newman, Ph.D., is a social psychologist and author of The Book of NO: 250 Ways to Say It--and Mean It and Stop People-pleasing Forever (McGraw-Hill, Dec. 2005), Nobody's Baby Now: Reinventing Your Adult Relationship with Your Mother and Father (Walker), Parenting an Only Child, The Joys and Challenges of Raising Your One and Only (Broadway/Doubleday), and Little Things Long Remembered: Making Your Children Feel Special Every Day (Random House/Crown), among others. See: www.susannewmanphd.com
